Rats!

Charlie Brown used to say it when he was frustrated. "Good grief" was another of his exclamations that some may use while reading this.

You see I recently acquired two rodents. Rats. Cute little black and white baby rats. That was the listing on the NewBedford Freecycle forum. Freecycle was started so that people could post items they no longer needed and wished to give away. By offering these items they won't end up in landfills. A noble idea, indeed. With the 11 baby rats offered, the owners hoped their son's pets wouldn't end up as snake food. It seems they bought one female and when she was brought home...surprise. Quite a bargain.

I went to the peoples home to get a pair of rattus rattus for pets. I thought they would be a great addition to the 'Man Cave', the name given to my shed by my sister, Lianne. So they were destined to become garage rats. They have settled into the wood shaving litter lined 30 gallon aquarium and survived below freezing nights, huddled together in their newspaper strip nest.

I seem to be the only admirer so far. Grace from next door wasn't interested at a peek at one when I brought it out to the fence separating our back yards. "Don't let that thing go!" was about all I can remember from the conversation. Even my cat Willy took one look at the aquarium and ran out of the shed. "Fine hunter you are" I thought as Willy disappeared over the horizon. Now, my cat real is a ferocious stalker. He has brought close to a dozen mice and two moles over last year. He brought home and dismembered several birds, one of them in my bedroom. Feathers still turn up every once and a while. Other items dragged home were a good sized snake skin, without the snake, and 3 or four squirrel legs with the tails attached. I assume coyotes caught the squirrels and were just too full to finish the 4th leg and tail. In a sudden fit of genius, one day I attached a tail and leg combo to my sisters Jeep Liberty's antenna using a clothespin. I watched the Jeep pull out of the driveway and disappear. "Hmm, I guess she didn't notice," I thought. About two minutes later the phone rang and threats of death filled my ear when I answered. It was worth it. Too bad it fell off somewhere on Sconticut Neck road.

Back to the rats. Hopefully my two rats will not end up a dozen, I was assured they were both girls. Honestly, I can't tell if they are or not. I haven't even tried. Not interested.

Oh, their names you ask. Thelma and Louise. Thelma is the cuter one.